Let me say this up front: If you’ve ever found yourself staring at an empty bag of chips or polishing off way more dessert than you planned… you’re not broken. You’re not weak. And you’re definitely not alone.
I know what that spiral feels like. I’ve lived it more times than I can count.
But what I’ve come to realize is that binge eating isn’t really about food. It’s not even about self-control. It’s about what’s going on underneath—in our minds, in our emotions, and honestly, in our souls.
The Mindset That Fuels a Binge
In my own journey, I’ve noticed two mental patterns that tend to trigger a binge:
1. “I already messed up, so who cares?”
This is that all-or-nothing thinking. If the day didn’t go perfectly—if you slipped, or you’re stressed—you figure you might as well just go all in and start again tomorrow. Problem is, tomorrow never seems to come.
2. “This is my last chance.”
This one’s sneaky. You tell yourself that after tonight, it’s back to being strict. So you go big. You overeat—not because you’re hungry, but because deep down you believe this is the last time you’ll get to taste that food.
Both of these come from a scarcity mindset. And both of them lead to guilt, shame, and starting over… again.
But here’s the thing I’ve been learning:
It’s not about willpower. It’s about the rules you’ve created—and the pressure those rules are putting on your life.
From Restriction to Responsibility
If you’re trying to lose weight or eat better, I get it. But somewhere along the way, I started asking a different question:
“What if I could eat well, honor God with my body, and still have room for things I enjoy—without guilt?”
That shift changed everything.
It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being intentional.
I don’t need to swing between obsession and apathy. I need to walk in discipline—and to me, discipline means freedom with structure. It means taking ownership of what I put in my body, instead of swinging from shame to binge and back again.
The 90/10 Framework (What I’m Using Now)
One of the most helpful concepts I’ve started applying is something I call the 90/10 principle.
It’s not a diet. It’s not a plan. It’s a posture.
Here’s what it looks like:
- 90% of what I eat serves my health, my goals, and my energy.
- 10% is intentional flexibility—foods I enjoy that don’t derail me.
That might mean hitting my protein goal early, staying on track with meals during the day, and leaving room for a treat at night if I want one. Not as a reward—but as a choice I made on purpose.
Because when I give myself permission in advance, I’m not at war with my cravings anymore.
And you know what? Most nights, that freedom actually leads to self-control. Because the temptation doesn’t have power over me anymore.
The Faith Side of This
I’d be missing the point if I didn’t say this: I believe discipline is spiritual.
Scripture says in 2 Timothy 1:7,
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”
A sound mind. That means self-control. That means not being ruled by what we crave.
I’ve had to pray through this. A lot. I’ve had to surrender food, surrender shame, and ask God to help me see food the way He does—not as an idol, not as a reward, but as fuel and fellowship.
And on the days I mess up? I don’t spiral anymore. I repent, I reset, and I keep walking.
How You Can Start the 90/10 diet plan
If you’re tired of the binge-restrict cycle, I want to offer a few simple steps that have helped me:
1. Anchor Your Identity First
You’re not just someone trying to lose weight. You’re a child of God. That’s your foundation. Everything else flows from that truth.
2. Define Your 90%
Make a short list of meals and foods that help you feel good—physically, mentally, and spiritually. That’s your base. Build from there.
3. Pre-approve Your 10%
Choose a few “flex” foods that you enjoy and can eat with intention. Not cheat meals. Not guilt trips. Just part of your rhythm.
4. Check in with yourself
After you eat, ask: “Did I feel in control? Did that satisfy me?” That self-awareness helps you grow.
5. Forgive fast
You don’t need to carry yesterday’s failure into today. That’s not freedom. That’s a lie. Grace is new every morning.
Final Thoughts
If you’re in a place right now where food feels like it has power over you—I see you. And I want you to know there’s hope.
You don’t need more rules. You need more clarity on who you are, what matters, and how you want to live.
You can walk in freedom.
You can build discipline.
And you can honor God—even with the way you eat.
If you want help getting started, I’ve created a free 31-Day Devotional for Men Who Refuse to Quit called Start Strong. It’s not just about food—it’s about building a life rooted in resilience, grace, and real growth. You can grab it here.
We’re in this together.
